Where Moms Gather Together to Support Each Other
C.S. Lewis once wrote, “Friendship is born when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one!'”
That is what the Cherokee Creek Boys School Mama Bear Retreats are all about.
It’s a time where kindred spirits … who are all on a journey with their own struggling sons… gather together to share their stories and form new friendships with “important strangers.”
“Instead of judgment and unreasonable expectations, what mothers need is love and care — from friends, partners, and each other.”
– Maryam Abdullah, Ph.D.
What Kind of Support Do Moms Need?
Parenting Program Director, Greater Good Science Center
We talked with Beth Black, Founder and Owner of CCBS, to find out more about these special events.
What is the Mama Bear Retreat?
“Twice a year, I host a retreat for 5 – 10 moms who have sons at CCBS along with someone from our CCBS team. The retreats take place at relaxing venues that pamper the moms and offer them time for both rest and play.
Although there is an official program, much of the healing and fun happens around the kitchen table at breakfast, in small group chats while preparing meals or after dinner once the program is over.”
Why Did You Start the Mama Bear Retreats?
A circle of women has a magical power to promote healing through time-shared, nonjudgmental conversations and the release of fear and burdens with people who can truly say, “What? You too? I thought I was the only one.”
It helps the moms realize that they are not the only one with this challenge and that others are there to support them. I am always impressed by how courageous these women are … sharing what is deep in their hearts … even the really hard stuff … within this special circle of other moms.”
How Do the Moms Feel at the End of the Retreat?
“I’ve hosted 28 retreats over the years and each one has been a joy!
By the end of the retreat, many deep friendships are formed. Most groups remain close while their sons are at CCBS through phone calls, emails and meeting up at the Family Seminars. And post-graduation, many remain friends, gather for reunions and continue to support each other after their time at CCBS.
It’s magical being with women who arrive as separate individuals on a journey and by the end of the retreat they come together as a harmonious group. It’s amazing what a little time away … sharing and getting support from others … can do to restore the spirit!”
According to the recent Parenting in America Today survey by Pew Research Center, about two-thirds of mothers find parenting harder than they thought it would be, and nearly half of moms say being a parent is tiring most or all of the time.
What’s more, nearly half of moms say they feel judged about the way they parent their children by their own or their partner’s parents.
Instead of judgment and unreasonable expectations, what mothers need is support — from friends, partners, and community. As busy moms, we can support each other and take steps to get the mothering that we need for ourselves.
“It is my earnest wish that women can commonly come to prioritize, and to regularly receive themselves, the steadfast love and care that is uniquely associated with the term ‘mothering’.”
– Suniya Luthar
Who Mothers Mommy? Factors That Contribute to Mothers’ Well-Being.
Researcher at APA PsychNet, American Psychological Association